Author: Anastasia Pinkse

Editors: Kintan van Leeuwen & Elisah Sauerbier

NOTE: The names used for developmental phases of children may differ. However, the names in the article are used by the CDC which is the American Centre for Disease Control.

From a baby to an infant

The development of a child already starts in the womb. During the first trimester, the embryo develops physically, meaning the clump of cells becomes a little body. From the second trimester, the brain begins to receive impulses from light and will also develop senses such as touch and taste. At 23 weeks the foetus develops the ability to hear and after birth, the baby might be able to recognize sounds which they perceive from inside the womb. By 27 weeks, the last week of the second trimester, the foetus’ brain is very active. In the third trimester, the baby is physically growing and the brain is developing even further. By 39 weeks the baby is fully grown and ready to be born into the world (Marple, 2021). After the baby is born he or she will further develop and the interaction with its parents becomes an essential foundation for one’s development.  Once the baby is 5 months old and continues to develop, it is important to let them explore the world. As a baby explores the world their confidence will grow as well as their sense of autonomy and independence. Furthermore, the first interactions of the baby with the outside world are constitutive. Through interaction with parents and close family members, the baby will learn its native language along with its society’s norms and values. Besides that, the act of a parent reading and singing to their baby stimulates the baby’s imagination. 

Every baby develops at their own pace, however, it is important to visit a doctor if the baby does not make eye contact, is not happy when they see people they know, does not babble or try to talk when they reach 12 months (Your Baby’s Growth and Development - First 12 Months, n.d.).

What stimulation does a toddler need?

According to the CDC, toddlers from 1-2 years will increase their independence, copy other children at the playground, and recognize familiar names of family members or objects. This stage is also important as toddlers learn to communicate and socialize, therefore, making human contact and interacting with the baby is extremely important (CDC, 2019). 

When a toddler is 15 months old they will show some milestones in multiple areas. In the social or emotional milestone, toddlers will show affection through hugs and kisses either with their favourite doll, toy or parents. They clap when excited and show objects that they like (CDC, 2022). A toddler will also interact more with language. As they try to say or name an object, point when they need help and start to follow directions with the use of words and gestures (CDC, 2022).  The CDC advises parents to read with the toddler on a daily basis, help with completing words when the toddler speaks and do sorting games or puzzles. 

The next milestone is around 18 months, during which the toddler will increase their independence even more, as they move away from you but still look and see if you are near. A toddler is also able to follow directions without gestures, as their vocabulary increases. Furthermore, the toddler will copy you doing chores or other activities and will also feed themselves using their fingers (CDC, 2022). In this phase human contact is also important, the CDC advises you to do simple activities such as learning your child about other people's emotions or encouraging behaviour you want to see. As a parent you are the best teacher for your child, so encouraging and interacting with them as frequently as possible is highly recommended. 

By the time a toddler reaches 2 years, it is wonderful to see how much they have grown. In this phase it is still important to see if a toddler is capable of reaching the following milestones:

• With the social/emotional milestone, 2-year-old toddlers should be able to recognize emotions and look at your face to see how you react in situations, to learn more about emotions. 

• Following on to the language/communication milestone a toddler should be able to say two words together, use more gestures and be able to point at body parts when asked or point and recognise an animal in a book. According to the CDC, a parent can help his or her toddler by letting them help prepare their meal, like holding their own plates. During playdates, parents should watch their toddlers closely as they cannot solve problems yet such as sharing a toy or taking turns on the swings (CDC, 2022). 

Here is a useful cheat sheet for extra tips for raising Toddlers (2-3 years of age). 

The developmental milestones of a preschooler

A preschooler is a child between the age of 3 to 5 years old. This phase where children slowly grow into early childhood makes them interact more with the “open world”. According to the CDC, in the preschool years, children will interact more easily with other adults and children as they become more independent. This interaction with other people is of great importance as the child is shaping their personality and will think and move as they please. Other milestones and skills of preschoolers are playing easily with other children, noticing a difference between biological sexes and recalling a story, to name a few (CDC, 2021). Here is a link to a tip sheet where more information is provided: Preschoolers (3-5 years of age).

By the time a preschooler reaches 4 years, a parent can see significant growth and development. Take the social/emotional milestones for example, in this phase a preschooler can comfort friends by giving them hugs, they would also ask if they can play with a friend. Furthermore, a 4-year-old preschooler is able to adapt their behaviour and emotions to the place they visit, such as a church or a library. The preschooler has also grown in the language/communication milestone, as they can now make up sentences around four words, answer simple questions or talk about one thing that happened during the day. Even in the cognitive milestone a preschooler advances, as they are able to name colours, can draw a person with three or more body parts and can also explain what occurs in a story. Again in this phase, a parent can do a lot to help them to interact comfortably in this world. For example, a parent can help by preparing them for visiting a church by doing a roleplay or reading stories about it. Parents should also help their preschooler by teaching them about shapes, sizes and colours. 

When a child reaches 5 years they almost reach the end of preschool, this time is paramount to interact with the child as a parent in order to prepare them to go to school. According to the CDC, the parent should ask questions about how and why, so the child is able to expand their answers. Moreover, as a child wants to be more independent they will test the boundaries of their parents, so it is important here for a parent to focus on their positive behaviour. This means not only learning to accept a ‘no’ or respecting the boundaries of others but also learning to set their own boundaries. In this phase, a child develops significantly in the cognitive milestone. For example, the child can recognise numbers and count to 10 and can also recognise letters and use some of them to write out their names. Additionally, the child can talk about events regarding time, using words such as yesterday or tomorrow. There are also some developments in the social/emotional milestone as a 4-year-old learns how to do some simple chores, follow rules and takes turns when playing with other children. Moreover, the 4-year-old preschooler also advances in the language/communication milestone, he or she can tell a small story, have a small conversation with more than three back-and-forth exchanges and can answer questions about a story you just read or told them.

The progress in the middle childhood years

According to the CDC, the middle childhood years are between the ages of 6 to 11 years old, they make a distinction, however, between 6 to 8 years old and 9 to 11 years. First, let’s take a look at the developmental milestones of a 6 to 8-year-old, as a child is going to school and becoming more self-sufficient. Their independence is visible in little things such as putting on their clothes or tying their shoes. Their world outside the family is also important as they are making friends and creating their social circle. These children will grow significantly socially, but mentally and physically they still need to grow confident in several areas such as school, sports or friendships. During this time there are a number of developmental milestones these children reach. Encouraged through their school environment, they make a significant change in the social/emotional area, as they are now dealing with the outside world and people outside of their families. Children in this age group are more likely to be more independent from parents and family because they will be paying more attention to friendships, teamwork and being liked by others. Furthermore, they will be focused more on their future and their place in this world (Child Development: Middle Childhood (6–8 Years Old) | CDC, 2021).

For this reason, parents are advised to positively stimulate children so they can move safely through the world with confidence and ease. The CDC advises parents to do the following activities. For example, give praise to your children for achieving goals or accomplishments such as: “You did a great job solving this problem!” As a parent, it is better to compliment children on what they do instead of focusing on fixed talents such as being smart. As a child goes to school it is suggested that parents get involved with the school and teachers, so parents are aware of the goals that should be reached. Besides that, a parent can also help their children to expand their talents into other areas and let them try out new things by signing them up for activities such as sports, music or drama classes (Child Development: Middle Childhood (6–8 Years Old) | CDC, 2021). Setting up rules, however, is also important as a child needs to learn what is allowed and not allowed to do. This will help them to learn more about boundaries and how to respect them. 

For more information and tips, visit the following link: Middle Childhood (6-8 years of age).  

Not only are children focused on friendships and peer relationships, but they are also more involved in their academic lives. Try to talk with your child about doing their homework and setting future goals. Help your child by teaching them to take responsibility, for example, they cannot play before finishing homework. Children around this age will slowly become more aware of their bodies, therefore it is also important as a parent to talk about changes and watch out for insecurities or unhealthy eating habits. This positive parenting sheet will provide more information and tips: Middle Childhood (9-11 years of age).

The growth of young teens

This phase is especially hectic for children as everything changes for them, not only their bodies but also their academic journey as they will start going to high school. The changes within themselves and their surroundings can have a big impact on a child. Parents, therefore, have the responsibility to guide their children through it and create a loving and safe space at home. The CDC gives this phase the name of ‘young teens’ and children in this category are between the ages of 12 to 14. As mentioned before, young teens will experience physical transitions. The male sex starts growing facial and pubic hair. Whereas the female sex starts growing breasts, pubic hair and starts getting their period. Physical changes like these can cause teens to feel shame and worry about what other people might think about their appearance. 

Furthermore, young teens can experience moodiness due to hormones and can therefore be short-tempered and tend to be more sensitive or sad. Listen and acknowledge the feelings of teens and respect their opinions. It is important that they feel heard and their feelings are taken seriously. As peer pressure increases, a parent should talk about the dangers of drugs, unsafe sex, drinking and smoking. However, during such talks, it is important to be mindful of the tone and manner, to never sound condescending as teens might interpret this differently than intended (Child Development: Young Teens (12–14 Years Old) | CDC, 2021). This time is not only challenging for the children but for parents as well, as teens can have mood swings and be more closed off than before. To help parents during this time, here are two links which might help. This is the link to the positive parenting sheet: Young Teens (12-14 years of age). Here is a link to a website with useful tools to help parents with their teens that are struggling with their mental health | The National Academies Press | Tools for Supporting Emotional Wellbeing in Children and Youth.

Why human contact is important to become a healthy person

Throughout every developmental phase a child goes through, the support and contact of their parents and other people is extremely important. Good parenting starts with the fetus inside the womb when parents show love and affection by touching the belly, speaking to them and singing songs for example. Once the baby is born, it is important to have a loving and caring family that stimulates the baby to explore the world safely. Eventually, the infant will grow up and will come into contact with other people during its childhood. Through this contact, a child learns to interact with others, learns about emotions and respecting and recognizes boundaries. But why is human contact so important for children and what happens when a child is deprived of it?

Children who have been deprived of human contact suffer from a syndrome called the Kaspar-Hauser syndrome, also known as psychosocial short stature. According to Sirotnak, an MD(Doctor of Medicine) specialized in paediatrics-child abuse and neglect, psychosocial short stature is a disorder where children have a short stature or dwarfism due to neglectful parenting and emotional deprivation (2021). But who was Kaspar Hauser to whom this syndrome is named? In the book Livewired: The inside story of the ever-changing brain, the author, David Eagleman, presents the story of Kaspar Hauser, a sixteen-year-old boy who lived during the 19th century whom many suggested to be the hereditary prince of Baden who had died sixteen years ago. Kaspar claimed that he grew up in a small, dark cell and was only fed bread and water. He told others that he learned to write from a man without a face. However, according to Eagleman, the claim of Kaspar is false, as a child which has truly been neglected by its parents would never be able to speak, write and thrive the way Kaspar did (2021, p.22). 

According to Eagleman, there is also another phenomenon where children are deprived of human contact, which is called a feral child (2021, p.21). A real-life feral child was found in Florida in 2005 after police were alerted by concerned neighbours (2021, p.22). When police entered a small bedroom they found little Danielle, who was covered in faeces and cockroaches (2021, p.23). Police, social workers or psychologists were unable to interact with her as she did not know what normal human interaction was. She was also unable to make small gestures such as nodding yes or no, eating solid foods or using a toilet. Experts had eventually established that this was the cause of social neglect (2021, p.23). The tragic story of Danielle shows the importance of human contact, as the brain can only develop properly by worldly experience. Once the brain lacks these experiences the brain becomes distorted and pathological (Eagleman, 2021. p. 24). “Like a tree that needs nutrient-rich soil to arborize, a brain requires the rich soil of social and sensory interaction” (Eagleman, 2021, p.24). 

Little Leaders Foundation aims to inform the public on a variety of topics, trends and issues the world is facing today.  Our organization is committed to contributing to a better future for all. All children deserve to grow up in a safe and loving environment, with the support of parents or guardians. This article demonstrates how essential and meaningful human interaction is to a child’s development and ultimately lays a foundation for who the child will become. Therefore we ask everyone who suspects that a child might be neglected or shows any signs of deprivation, to contact one of these phone numbers:

• Veilig Thuis : 0800-20 00 (NL) 

• NSPCC : 0808 800 5000 (UK)